Hello everyone… I haven’t said that in a long time, but hey, better late than never, no? Welcome back to the blog. I know I have not posted any sort of news, articles, the like (the exception to this being my last article on Palm Inc.) in a very long time. I hope to fix that as the next few months roll on.

In any case, I figured I’d spend some time updating you on my life. The last real tangible “life” post I made was back in October, and yes, a lot has changed. Today was the last day of outdoor track practice. Since that last post, my team finished our Cross Country season with both a third place finish in the league and Section championships. Our indoor track team came in first for our division, also going undefeated. Finally, the outdoor track team tied for second place at the league level, and our Section meet is tomorrow afternoon at my old home (Middletown). In regards to sports, this has by far been not only the most successful, but also the most enjoyable, season.

Before my high school graduation (which is less than a month away), I have one final thing to compete in: the first ever Frisbee League that I spent weeks establishing. As it stands now, we have six teams of seven players competing in around a dozen matches. This should be an incredibly fun three weeks, if it all works out as planned! The next month should hopefully be both fun and relatively laid back… or so I hope.

In any case, it’s been a good few months, and I will be trying to post more frequently with some informative articles, opinions, and the like. Enjoy the nice weather!

I really can’t even begin to explain how sorry I am for not updating the blog in over a month. While I promised to have a good, informative post every week or two, my plan for such a schedule failed miserably. That being said, I’m back, and ready to update everyone on what has been quite a fun, intense, awkward, and all around decent month and a half.

In the time since my last update, seasons have changed, operating systems have been updated, new musical albums have been released, school and cross country has started, and I haven’t been sick. Yes, quite a course of events if I must say to myself. In any case, the most important event (well, combination of events, I would say) has been school starting. For the first time in eleven years, I was not worried about school starting. I guess when it’s your last year in high school, ‘starting new’ isn’t really exactly what it seems, especially for me. I was going back into school with all my old friends, some of my old teachers in new classes, a course load to scare away most incompetent bastards, and a cross country and Frisbee team that is getting ready to win the league championships.

School as whole was never hard. Over the past two years I’ve realized that I have to work hard, but I can still have fun and joke around. This year takes that mantra of thought to a whole new level. For two periods every day I have AP Physics (I bypassed standard Physics), which is filled mostly with my friends, a cool teacher, and an overall fun time. While the class won’t be easy, I’d rather work slightly more and get college credit than sit around in a standard high school class. Third period every day is a study hall, which consists of my second breakfast of the day (a bagel with butter and some orange juice), and, when homework doesn’t need to be done, some intense games of Uno. Fourth period, though, is the worst part of my day. In order to take AP Physics, I would not be able to take the college English class I was originally signed up to take. As such, I was thrown into Short Stories and Creative Writing with all of the ‘unwashed masses’. Basically, this is where people go when they don’t want any sort of college prep or credit. In short: it’s a bunch of stupid people and me. Coming from an honors level course last year, with essays and term papers filled with enhanced vocabulary and thoughts, this is like dying a slow death. It’s so bad I had to explain, and spell, the word ‘hypocrite’ during a group discussion the other day. If I didn’t need the class to graduate, I’d have dropped it in a heartbeat. Fifth period every day is another study hall, and since most of my homework is usually finished in third period study hall, this is where the championship-level Uno games are held. On a side note, I play Uno a lot. By the time 11:30am rolls around, I’m in my favorite class of the day: AP Government. Since I’m leaning towards a History or Political Science major in college, I enjoy the majority of subjects and discussions we have in class. Plus, we have a cool teacher. For example, we bribed him with baked goods (brownies, cookies, etc.) to delay the due dates for assignments. Pretty cool, no? Seventh period is lunch, which is a load of fun. I can’t count the number of times I’ve laughed till I cried in the past few weeks alone. Eighth period is college algebra, which, although not fun, isn’t that hard. The teacher picks on me for not doing a little question on the homework or what not, but seeing as though he was good friends with my late uncle, I can see why he is pushing me to try harder. Finally, ninth period is (college level) French, which is the same teacher I had two years ago. In all honesty, the class is incredibly easy. We are reading French murder mysteries, and the teacher reads the passage in French, and then translates it to English for us. That’s basically the class. All in all, it’s a great school schedule. Most of the classes I’m taking will help me in terms of college (I should be leaving high school with 19 college credits, which is over a semesters worth of classes), and it really isn’t all that difficult so far.

Since I do not exactly have the time to discuss some new technology news and rumors I’ve been hearing, I will call this an end for now. And don’t worry, my next update will not take a month to get out the door!

A little over seven months ago, things weren’t going so great for me, I won’t lie. My grades in school were dropping quite fast, I had just gotten over a bout of pneumonia that, for the first time in a very long time (including two back to back years of surgeries) had knocked me down and out cold, and my social and athletic life wasn’t so great either. At times, you feel as if any of the choices you have made that end up making your life, or others, miserable, hasn’t been right. As such, I decided to push my luck. I decided to base some of my most important decisions off of a coin flip. People called me crazy, stupid, idiotic. Others thought it was a great idea. My opinion on it? If my own personal thoughts went into prior issues and choices, which ended up causing problems, then an unbiased decider should be used. With a coin, it’s either yes or no; heads or tails; one option or another. There is no feeling involved. It’s a flip, a catch, and a reveal.

My story starts in early December (of 2008). At the time, I was in anguish over certain things (how I felt about certain people, how my academics were, my health), when all of sudden, out of the blue, I was invited to a particular person’s birthday party. Not really a big deal in itself (though it turns out my thoughts and hints about the particular occasion and person were correct, in retrospect), but the fact that I was going (albeit with a friend) to such an occasion, for a person I barely knew, was something in itself. So that’s when I decided to lay it all on the line. I really had no reason to go to such a party, but nothing to lose in any fashion if I did. To be honest, I had no real feelings on the matter, so I decided to just flip a coin to see what I was going to do.

Some details about the ‘lucky’ coin, though. It’s a 2001 mint US dollar coin, with Sacagawea inscribed on it, as an eagle on the reverse side. My grandfather (who is still alive, so this isn’t necessarily sentimental) had given me the coin several years prior, and after a bit of cleaning, it was shining in its glory once again. I happened upon it in my nightstand drawer one day by accident. I had thrown it on my desk in hopes of finding a better place for it, but it just ended up being placed in my wallet after this first ‘deciding’ flip.

So, when it came down to it, the coin said I should go (heads), two times out of three. As such, the decision was made without any sort of personal feeling. I was going, no matter what my suspicions were, and that was that. A few weeks passed by, and the party came. I went, enjoyed myself, talked with the host for a few minutes, and left once it all ended with my friend who I had attended with. Not really a big spectacle, but influential none the less.

A few months passed, four to be specific, and we ended up in late April of this year. Turns out that my suspicions that the person in question (a female) had in fact had feelings for me, and to spare you the entire story over again, ended up going to prom with me. That’s not to say that the coin only made one appearance in between these months, its prior decisions just aren’t as notable as the point of this discussion. So, I flipped the coin, decided to discuss prom with her, and that was that. The decision was made.

But as the past three months have stretched on, things have become, well, strained, to say the least. It’s been tremulous in many regards, and although I feel that we have grown closer as friends, and as something more, it’s evident that she does not know what she wants anymore. She has flipped back and forth regarding ‘us’ that it’s sickening, to be honest. Now, after not speaking to one of her best friends (coincidently, the friend who I attended her party with), she wants to patch things up and hope that they end up as good as they used to be. Sad thing is, they won’t.

This kid has been a complete jerk to her, and, even as his good friend, cannot deny this. She has high hopes that tomorrow morning, they will patch things up and everything will be peachy keen as always. The thing is, I don’t think they will. Over the past month, she’s been through hell trying to decide what she wants from him. Unfortunately, he hasn’t been in the same predicament. He told me that they will never be as close as they once were, and that this separation hasn’t torn him up as much as it has her. I should have told her what she said, as a friend and whatever else she sees me as, but I just couldn’t hurt her. She’s had a rough life (more than I care to detail on here), but I just couldn’t tell her that this is how he felt. He promised me he would listen to what she would have to say and not argue with her, but that doesn’t mean things will end up the way either of them want it. It’s a sad, but necessary, conversation to have.

So, where does the coin come into all of this? It’s quite simple really. Tomorrow, after their conversation is through, and I understand the full depth of what has happened, I will flip it one more time. What decision is to be made? Should I continue on this rollercoaster path of trying to be more, when she wants me to be, or just give up and call it what it is: a friendship. I’m not one to squander my feelings, but in this case, the chance and luck of a coin flip is the best way to go. No feelings, no thoughts, no regrets. It’s heads or tails; a yes or no; nothing more, nothing less.